I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
