I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
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