I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
