no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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