I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
