Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
wow bdsm is so cute
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
