scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
We named our party play list daddy issues
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
