Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
