My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
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