I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize
