Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Randomize
