Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
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