my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
And then my night got REAL pukey
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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