she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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