so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
