i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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