Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Randomize