How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
Randomize
