come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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