oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
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