I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
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