So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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