thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
They took my balls.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Randomize
