it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
