Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
Randomize
