dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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