found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
Randomize
