we have officially mastered the walk of shame
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Randomize
