Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
