It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Randomize
