He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
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