dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
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