is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Randomize
