wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Randomize
