Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
