Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize
