we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
