addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
