In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
Your shirt... Was in my pants
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
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