Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
either way he was missing a nipple.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize
