He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
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