Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
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