so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
