I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
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