I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
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