Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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