He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
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