You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
Randomize
