Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
