If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
